125+ Amazing Quotes By Mark Twain That Are Wonderful

Written by Vishal for Factober

FACTOBER KNOWLEDGE & INSPIRATION

September 20, 2020

Mark Twain Quotes

Mark Twain is the greatest humorist. He is best known for The Adventures of Tom Sawyer (1876) and Adventures of Huckleberry Finn. Samuel Langhorne Clemens known by his pen name Mark Twain, was an American writer, humorist, entrepreneur. #Top100+, #AmazingQuotes, #Mark Twain, #QuotesMarkTwain, #MarkTwainQuotes, #InspirationalQuotes, #MotivationalQuotes, #InspiringQuotes, #Motivation,Inspiration, #Inspiring

  1. I have never let my schooling interfere with my education.
  2. ‘Classic’ – a book which people praise and don’t read.
  3. A lie can travel halfway around the world while the truth is putting on its shoes.
  4. Don’t go around saying the world owes you a living. The world owes you nothing. It was here first.
  5. Never allow someone to be your priority while allowing yourself to be their option.
  6. Sanity and happiness are an impossible combination.
  7. Patriotism is supporting your country all the time and your government when it deserves it.
  8. All you need in this life is ignorance and confidence; then success is sure.
  9. Everyone is a moon, and has a dark side which he never shows to anybody.
  10. There was never yet an uninteresting life. Such a thing is an impossibility. Inside of the dullest exterior there is a drama, a comedy, and a tragedy.
  11. The two most important days in your life are the day you are born and the day you find out why.
  12. Forgiveness is the fragrance that the violet sheds on the heel that has crushed it.
  13. I thoroughly disapprove of duels. If a man should challenge me, I would take him kindly and forgivingly by the hand and lead him to a quiet place and kill him.
  14. Worrying is like paying a debt you don’t owe.
  15. Get your facts first, and then you can distort them as much as you please.
  16. It is better to deserve honors and not have them than to have them and not deserve them.
  17. In the first place God made idiots. This was for practice. Then he made school boards.
  18. Books are for people who wish they were somewhere else.
  19. Under certain circumstances, profanity provides a relief denied even to prayer.
  20. A successful book is not made of what is in it, but what is left out of it.
  21. If you tell the truth, you don’t have to remember anything.
  22. Don’t part with your illusions. When they are gone you may still exist, but you have ceased to live.
  23. Few things are harder to put up with than the annoyance of a good example.
  24. Man is the only animal that blushes. Or needs to.
  25. A lie can travel half way around the world while the truth is putting on its shoes.
  26. There’s one way to find out if a man is honest: ask him; if he says yes, you know he’s crooked.
  27. It’s better to keep your mouth shut and appear stupid than open it and remove all doubt.
  28. Life does not consist mainly, or even largely, of facts or happenings. It consist mainly of the storm of thoughts that is forever flowing through one’s head.
  29. The secret to getting ahead is getting started.
  30. Obscurity and a competence—that is the life that is best worth living.
  31. I must have a prodigious amount of mind; it takes me as much as a week, sometimes, to make it up!
  32. The worst loneliness is to not be comfortable with yourself.
  33. A person that started in to carry a cat home by the tail was getting knowledge that was always going to be useful to him, and warn’t ever going to grow dim or doubtful.
  34. Travel is fatal to prejudice, bigotry, and narrow-mindedness, and many of our people need it sorely on these accounts. Broad, wholesome, charitable views of men and things cannot be acquired by vegetating in one little corner of the earth all one’s lifetime.
  35. Good friends, good books, and a sleepy conscience: this is the ideal life.
  36. The best way to cheer yourself is to try to cheer someone else up.
  37. When I was younger, I could remember anything, whether it had happened or not; but my faculties are decaying now and soon I shall be so I cannot remember any but the things that never happened. It is sad to go to pieces like this but we all have to do it.
  38. A banker is a fellow who lends you his umbrella when the sun is shining, but wants it back the minute it begins to rain.
  39. In the beginning of a change the patriot is a scarce man, and brave, and hated and scorned. When his cause succeeds, the timid join him, for then it costs nothing to be a patriot.
  40. Thunder is good, thunder is impressive; but it is lightning that does the work.
  41. If you don’t read the newspaper, you’re uninformed. If you read the newspaper, you’re mis-informed.
  42. You can’t depend on your eyes when your imagination is out of focus.
  43. Persons attempting to find a motive in this narrative will be prosecuted; persons attempting to find a moral in it will be banished; persons attempting to find a plot in it will be shot.
  44. The more I learn about people, the more I like my dog.
  45. Be good and you will be lonesome.
  46. It is curious that physical courage should be so common in the world and moral courage so rare.
  47. The fact that man knows right from wrong proves his intellectual superiority to the other creatures; but the fact that he can do wrong proves his moral inferiority to any creatures that cannot.
  48. Eat a live frog first thing in the morning and nothing worse will happen to you the rest of the day.
  49. A half-truth is the most cowardly of lies.
  50. Training is everything. The peach was once a bitter almond; cauliflower is nothing but cabbage with a college education.
  51. The easy confidence with which I know another man’s religion is folly teaches me to suspect that my own is also.
  52. History doesn’t repeat itself, but it does rhyme.
  53. Of all God’s creatures, there is only one that cannot be made slave of the leash. That one is the cat. If man could be crossed with the cat it would improve the man, but it would deteriorate the cat.
  54. The right word may be effective, but no word was ever as effective as a rightly timed pause.
  55. Everyone is a moon, and has a dark side which he never shows to anybody.
  56. Out of all the things I have lost, I miss my mind the most.
  57. That is just the way with some people. They get down on a thing when they don’t know nothing about it.
  58. Action speaks louder than words but not nearly as often.
  59. Politicians and diapers must be changed often, and for the same reason.
  60. Reality can be beaten with enough imagination.
  61. Writing is easy. All you have to do is cross out the wrong words.
  62. Always do what is right. It will gratify half of mankind and astound the other.
  63. It’s easier to fool people than to convince them that they have been fooled.
  64. I didn’t have time to write a short letter, so I wrote a long one instead.
  65. The fear of death follows from the fear of life. A man who lives fully is prepared to die at any time.
  66. Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear – not absence of fear.
  67. It takes your enemy and your friend, working together, to hurt you to the heart: the one to slander you and the other to get the news to you.
  68. A clear conscience is the sure sign of a bad memory.
  69. Often it does seem such a pity that Noah and his party did not miss the boat.
  70. In a good bookroom you feel in some mysterious way that you are absorbing the wisdom contained in all the books through your skin, without even opening them.
  71. It is curious that physical courage should be so common in the world and moral courage so rare.
  72. Name the greatest of all inventors. Accident.
  73. I have found out that there ain’t no surer way to find out whether you like people or hate them than to travel with them.
  74. Always do what is right. It will gratify half of mankind and astound the other.
  75. The trouble is not in dying for a friend, but in finding a friend worth dying for.
  76. If animals could speak, the dog would be a blundering outspoken fellow; but the cat would have the rare grace of never saying a word too much.
  77. Never argue with stupid people, they will drag you down to their level and then beat you with experience.
  78. Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence on society.
  79. The most interesting information come from children, for they tell all they know and then stop.
  80. Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it is time to reform (or pause and reflect).
  81. Kindness is a language which the deaf can hear and the blind can see.
  82. To get the full value of joy you must have someone to divide it with.
  83. Don’t go around saying the world owes you a living. The world owes you nothing. It was here first.
  84. The best way to cheer yourself is to try to cheer someone else up.
  85. The worst loneliness is to not be comfortable with yourself.
  86. You believe in a book that has talking animals, wizards, witches, demons, sticks turning into snakes, burning bushes, food falling from the sky, people walking on water, and all sorts of magical, absurd and primitive stories, and you say that we are the ones that need help?
  87. After all these years, I see that I was mistaken about Eve in the beginning; it is better to live outside the Garden with her than inside it without her.
  88. Never tell the truth to people who are not worthy of it.
  89. When angry, count four. When very angry, swear.
  90. The man who does not read has no advantage over the man who cannot read.
  91. When we remember we are all mad, the mysteries disappear and life stands explained.
  92. I have a higher and grander standard of principle than George Washington. He could not lie; I can, but I won’t.
  93. You can’t depend on your eyes when your imagination is out of focus.
  94. If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous he will not bite you. This is the principal difference between a dog and man.
  95. When we remember we are all mad, the mysteries disappear and life stands explained.
  96. I was gratified to be able to answer promptly, and I did. I said I didn’t know.
  97. Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really great make you feel that you, too, can become great.
  98. Of all the animals, man is the only one that is cruel. He is the only one that inflicts pain for the pleasure of doing it.
  99. There are many humorous things in the world; among them, the white man’s notion that he is less savage than the other savages.
  100. The human race has only one really effective weapon and that is laughter.
  101. I did not attend his funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.
  102. If you don’t read the newspaper, you’re uninformed. If you read the newspaper, you’re misinformed.
  103. Any emotion, if it is sincere, is involuntary.
  104. Reader, suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself.
  105. Anger is an acid that can do more harm to the vessel in which it is stored than to anything on which it is poured.
  106. The difference between the almost right word and the right word is really a large matter. This the difference between the lightning bug and the lightning.
  107. Education consists mainly of what we have unlearned.
  108. Heaven goes by favor. If it went by merit, you would stay out and your dog would go in.
  109. The dog is a gentleman; I hope to go to his heaven not man’s.
  110. Never put off till tomorrow what may be done day after tomorrow just as well.
  111. Name the greatest of all inventors. Accident.
  112. Let us be thankful for the fools. But for them the rest of us could not succeed.
  113. God created war so that Americans would learn geography.
  114. I was gratified to be able to answer promptly, and I did. I said I didn’t know.
  115. I’ve lived through some terrible things in my life, some of which actually happened.Always acknowledge a fault. This will throw those in authority off their guard and give you an opportunity to commit more.
  116. Truth is stranger than fiction, but it is because Fiction is obliged to stick to possibilities; Truth isn’t.
  117. Now and then we had a hope that if we lived and were good, God would permit us to be pirates.
  118. Part of the secret of success in life is to eat what you like and let the food fight it out inside.
  119. In a good book-room, you feel in some mysterious way that you are absorbing the wisdom contained in all the books through your skin, without even opening them.
  120. Books are for people who wish they were somewhere else.
  121. I do not fear death. I had been dead for billions and billions of years before I was born, and had not suffered the slightest inconvenience from it.
  122. Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know because I’ve done it thousands of times.
  123. If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous he will not bite you. This is the principal difference between a dog and man.
  124. It’s not the size of the dog in the fight, it’s the size of the fight in the dog.
  125. Wrinkles should merely indicate where the smiles have been.
  126. If voting made any difference they wouldn’t let us do it.
  127. There is a charm about the forbidden that makes it unspeakably desirable.
  128. There isn’t time, so brief is life, for bickerings, apologies, heartburnings, callings to account. There is only time for loving, and but an instant, so to speak, for that.
  129. The trouble is not in dying for a friend, but in finding a friend worth dying for.
  130. I’ve had a lot of worries in my life, most of which never happened.
  131. Never argue with a fool, onlookers may not be able to tell the difference.

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